My site is not exactly in order of the events of my runners’  life.  I write about what pops into my mind  during my run earlier in the day.  I was pondering about years ago with two very small babies at home and the thought of a 5k event happening in my town on what was to be a beautiful spring morning.  80% of me thought  better to stay home and let the day go on as any other.  The other 20% knew I could do the 3.2 miles as I had each morning while  my neighborhood slept.  Looking back I am thankful my meager 20% positive feelings  triumphed over that negative, self-doubting 80%!   

Upon arriving at the race, I handed in my money and recieved a ‘number’.  I felt overwhelmed when I pinned that number to my oversized t-shirt.  I was thrilled with the choice I had made to come out on this brisk, yet gorgeous morning.  I was also a tad nervous.    My anticipation continued as several runners showed up.  These people were ‘real’ runners.  The clothes, the sneakers, the bodies!!  That 80% doubt started to flood my mind.  At about the time my stress level elevated; a women I  went to school with started waving vigorously at me.  I was so happy to see her and proceeded to speak of my fears as race time approached.   She told me this was her first race and she would simply be happy to finish.  That has carrried with me since my first race.  I now hear myself telling other self-doubters the same thing.  Her words calmed me down and when the horn blew for the race to begin, I kept my cool, paced myself and sped up at the end.  My time was 29:56.  I was so happy that I finished and so happy that my time was under 30:00.   I left that race before the names and prizes were called only to find out later I had won FIRST place in my age group.  My high school friend brought the medal to my home.   I will never forget the image of her hanging the medal out the window of her vehicle as she came honking and screaming around the corner to my house.  I was in shock!  To this day I  have that worthless little medal.  Of course, to me it is priceless.  I have went on to place in several races but  feel  the need to further my distance.  As my 40th birthday approaches I need to challenge my body beyond the 3.2 miles I know I can run.   As I continue my minimal daily runs, I will slowly begin going farther and farther. 

Another race is coming up in April.  I have been contacted by another friend I went to grade school with!  This will be Cris’s first race.  If she gets anxiety I will tell her, “To just finish the race”.  Hopefully this will be enough to calm her down and she, too will get a priceless medal for her first 5k race!

The right music can make your run better, longer, faster and so much more enjoyable.  Some people don’t prefer  music blasting in their ears as they exercise.  For me it is the opposite.  I just cannot listen to the sound of my labored breath as I approach the third mile.  I want to drown out all noises and concentrate on the music.  This is not to say that I am reckless in my venture out of doors.  I watch for vehicles, dogs, small children-all the while the ‘rocky’ theme is playing in my head!  Yes I said the Rocky theme!  Now I ask you-” How can you NOT run when you hear that song?”   Much to my childrens’ embarrasment-I feel the urge to raise my hands above my head upon hearing those first few notes!   

Up until Christmas I listened to an outdated CD player (skipless-that is)  Yes;  a large, round, on the go, from 1985  CD player.  Of course I could only listen to one artist during my entire run.  BUT I had to have that music.  My son recieved an Ipod nano over the Holidays and my exercise has been transformed!  How wonderful to have a small, virtually weightless UPDATED  little piece of  heaven to exercise with.   Thankfully he doesn’t mind my ‘borrowing’ this and we like many of the same artists.  I am quite confident to say he will be getting an ITUNES card from the Easter bunny. 

On a 5k race over the summer of 2008 I suddenly became a bit aware of my large, ‘cheeseburger’ looking CD player and mentioned it to my son.  He simply said, “Don’t worry what anyone thinks mom, just get a medal.”  Well I used the burger and I am happy to say I placed second in my age group (yes-there were more than 3 in my group! )  Music is part of my run.  whether it be an ancient, battery operated device or an awesome new and improved Ipod.  I seem to have a better, happier, more fulfilling run with the right music.

Upon thinking of a person who jogs/runs daily I envision an extremely lean, hard body with abs of steel.  Well,  I am not that person!  Although I want to be and I push myself to run harder and faster (I have even added weight-lifting to my routine)  That body eludes me!  I just do not have a typical runners body.

I am admitting this because I happen to be a woman with curves.  (Curves sounds better than excess weight!)  While I believe with each run I am getting physically fit and helping my heart and my mind, I do have those curves.  As life has progressed I have noticed these slight love handles (again a better word than fat) slowly creeping over my jeans.  Muffin top is the term my sister has deemed.   As in my first post-those jeans still fit-just a bit differently.  I actually have a particular  pair of  jeans I try on from time to time to make sure I am still where I should be according to MY comfort zone.  All body types are unique and at the end of the day, a healthy, happy body is the thing I am striving for.   When I was younger and a bit naive the thinnest of bodies I was envious of.  That is not what I strive for anymore.  I want to have the stamina to keep up with my active children.  I want the peace of mind my daily routine gives me.  I want  the rush I recieve when I cross the finish line in a simple 5K race-beating my previous time.  Running enables me to keep that energy I had had in my twenties.   I realize that my life is better than ever, I am better than ever, even  though I do not have a typical runners body!!

The team ‘captains’ finally picked me because no other children were left to choose!  Pretty much the jist of my grade school gym class experience.   I was not an athletic or competitive child.  Lets just say I did not stand out as the person to help the team to victory.  Don’t get me wrong, I had many friends and got along with the other children.  They just knew I was not of value when it came to speed, agility, and the basic pummeling of the other half of our young class.   I just remember not particularly embracing the name ‘picking’, out of breathe, sweat dripping, competitive nature of twenty five snot nose kids trying to impress the gym teacher.  Put it this way; I welcomed rain on gym day!

I reminence about those days because I would not have believed that I would become a woman who loves to jog!  A woman once not interested in competing- racing to the finish line in a 5k race.  Wanting with all my heart to beat my time and run past as many people as I can in the home stretch!  This did not come overnight.  From the time I can remember, I was never much for physical activities.  I simply dabbled in seasonal sports such as field hockey, cheerleading and softball.  Never excelling in any of them.  I don’t consider myself to be an athlete now.  I try to ‘run’ three to four miles daily and I  exercise with light weights.  But I cannot get past the past.  I am actually surprised at how much i enjoy the sweat dripping, out of breathe feeling that running gives me.  I compete with myself to do better than the day or week before.  To run faster, farther, longer.

Recently I asked my kids if (in gym class) two children are chosen to be captains and they pick names one by one to form their teams.  They looked at me as if i were crazy and said “No” basically at the same time.  I am happy to know that they will not be……………….the last one picked!

“So I can fit into my jeans.”  This is the answer I would give when friends and family would ask, “Why are you running at 4:30 in the morning?”  At the time I had an infant and toddler sleeping and that was the best hour to venture out before my day ‘officially’ started at 5:30.  My husband (now former) was also asleep so I was able to jump out of bed, put on my running gear, and head out!  Looking back-that was crazy!!  It was dark, a little scary and at times icy.  However; my jeans always fit!

I started my own running program about 15 years ago.  I was living in an apartment alone and after working two jobs I would come home, drink wine and eat whatever i wanted.  Not good.  I began to notice my jeans getting a bit snug and did not like the feeling.  Each day after work I would put on old clothing and sneakers and begin walking.  At that time I lived across from a park.  Walking around the park three times equals one mile. That one mile was my routine when I started to (finally) exercise.   I grew  bored of just walking and began to run in one minute intervals.  Slowly I started challenging myself to run to the blue car up ahead, or run to the stop sign.  Before i knew it I was running more than walking and truly enjoying it! I began to increase the distance or my excercising as well.   At about three monthes into my jogging/walking I was talking with one of my girlfriends.  She said “Your body hasn’t changed, why not just stop jogging?”  Those words made me want to keep running!  At approximately five monthes I noticed a big change in my entire body and especially my mind.  I fit into my (skinny) jeans with room to spare!!  I have always been rather upbeat but i was even happier and more carefree because of my daily routine.

I met my (ex) husband and continued to run.  I ran throughout my two pregnancies with ease.  And when the babies came home, yes I fit into my jeans!  I began to enter 5K races (3.2 miles) and winning first place in my age group.  I will be forty  this year!  I used to think that was ‘old’.  I actually feel better as I get older.  I am writing this blog because I was never ‘athletic’.  I was involved in sports in my youth; but only for a season or two.  I never truly excelled at any given activity.  I did not have a weight problem either, yet if i had not started to do SOMETHING-I may have at this point.  It is never too late to start working out and yes you DO have time.   I take just one half hour a day for myself.  I am a single mother of two children, I work full time, I work randomly on the weekends catering and I am a runner!!  AND…………..I fit into my jeans.