After a morning spent nursing and nursing and mooing and nursing and nursing some more and generally feeling like a cow, I threw in the towel. My legs felt mushy. My brain felt mushy. I failed to get out to do some easy errands until after lunch. Something needed to change. I needed a few minutes to reclaim myself.

So I put Squish down for his nap. I changed into my running clothes. I fed the babe one more time. And then I handed her to her dad and said, “I’ll be back in 20 minutes.” I figured that would be a good first-run-back. I figured I’d go to the local park and run a couple of laps around the jogging path. I figured I’d add in some fartleks to get my legs going again. I figured I’d come home feeling strong, that I’d be energized and able to take charge on the homefront again.

Twenty minutes later, I was back. My legs had two+ more miles on them. I did four loops around the park path. But the fartleks didn’t happen. Apparently, I only have one gear these days. My legs felt heavy and my abs felt weak, even though I tried to keep them tight as I ran.

It wasn’t a great run. It wasn’t the release I hoped it would be. But it was a start. And it was good to put the cow behind me and reclaim myself, if only for 20 minutes.

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