Note on Surprising Disappointments

These “notes” are ideas for essays/longer posts. If you see one that you think would make a good essay/post or that you just want to see what I would do with it, please let me know in the comments or in an e-mail! I would love to take on a challenge like that.


Over the past few weeks the boys’ bedtime routine has become . . . slightly more complex than it used to be. It was so simple. A couple of books. Scripture reading. A song. Toothbrushing. A prayer. Group hug. Good-nights. But now there is also the drama over who gets to have Mom brush their teeth first; and who gets to ride on Mom’s back as she crawls, on her hands and knees like a dinosaur, to the bedchamber; and then comes the, “Can you lie down with me for just a minute, Mom?” And sing me five more songs? While I duet with you in the silliest voice I can summon from inside my little body? And my brother does headstands on his bed?

It’s made bedtime a little bit more of chore at times. Like when I have a pile of dishes to do and writing to do after that and I’m already so tired I may just fall asleep on their beds. I admit to hoping they’d forget about some of the new traditions they’d come up with. I’d thought of just cutting it off: “Sorry boys, I’m not doing that any more. You need to go to sleep.” And then glorying in my victory.

But the past two nights they haven’t insisted on many of their usual requests.I was surprisingly disappointed to be let out of their room so easily. And I kind of hope that they beg me to stay tonight and sing with them and laugh at their non-sensical stories and jokes.

What are some things you’ve surprised yourself by being disappointed that your child(ren) gave up or grew out of?

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  1. It’s funny because we’ve always had a bedtime routine that takes forever and involves lots of negotiating for just one more book, back scratch, cuddle, horsey ride or sword fight! Some of these things don’t really help them wind down, but we always have fun together! I sometimes worry that we should shorten it and get to bed faster (and some nights we do), but for the most part I am happy with the time we get to spend together because in no time at all they will not want to do any of hose things with me. Plus I absolutely love playing with my kids, it makes being a mom worth all the hard stuff, they love it to, so its a perfect way to end our day together!
    I will be glad to hold on to this time for as long as possible.


    lizzie Reply:

    I totally agree. I feel like I am setting the groundwork for a strong relationship later on, but when I’m in the moment, and I’m tired and I know they’re just procrastinating or being silly, it’s hard to remember that. But I also know that we will have great memories of this time and be sad to see it go when they grow out of it.


  2. The transition from wanting to be held all the time, to wanting to walk/shuffle/run all the time. That’s the transition that normally comes hardest for me. My back doesn’t mind that my (heavy) children now want to be bipedal.


    lizzie Reply:

    Yeah, that’s the part where I start to feel that I don’t have a baby any more. For better or worse.


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